Archive for the ‘Things I don’t want to do’ Category

Too Fat Too Serve

Wednesday, October 21st, 2009

As many of you know, my discharge form the Navy was under less-than-desirable circumstances. I still managed to escape with an Honorable discharge, but it was, to date, my biggest failure.

I was kicked out because I was fat. I was Too Fat To Serve.

Thus the changing of all of my screen aliases from NukeEMUSN ( Nuclear Electricians Mate US Navy) to TooFat2Serve.

Recently, my doc noted that I have high blood pressure. Not high enough to medicate, but high enough to mention it. Couple that with my other body issues (feet, back, knees), and I’m slowly killing myself. At the very least, I’m working towards a major body-breaking event.

So I need to do something about it. I’ve needed to do something about it for quite some time now. I have let it go too long. I feel like Bilbo in “Lord of the Ring,” right before he pulls a disappearing act.

Problem is, I don’t quite know WHAT I’m going to do about it yet.

We’ve adjusted our home eating habits and I’m being careful about what I get when I’m in the city. Probably going to adjust it more, but given that I’m an eating machine, it’ll take time to adjust.

So that leaves my nemesis; exercise. A word that I hate so much that I can’t spell it correctly without a spell checker.

I’m way too cheap/broke to join a gym. My foot/knee problems make running a no-go. So I’m going to have to get creative with it. Active video games and calisthenics.

I’ve tweaked a Google Docs spreadsheet as a fat-o-meter. It’s on the right side there. I’m going to track my weight loss on here. I hope you readers (all, like, 5 of you) will keep me accountable.

My first goal is 220lbs. The graph is only going to November 21, but my goal is that weight by about January 21. Slow and steady on this one.

Hopefully, by this time next year, I’ll no longer be too fat to do anything.

Posted in The Fatness, Things I don't want to do, Working Out | 3 Comments »

The Fat Man (doesn’t want to) Runneth

Friday, August 7th, 2009
Not mine, but you get the idea

Not my gut, but you get the idea. Picture by dotbenjamin on Flickr.

I really don’t like to exercise. I don’t make apologies for it, I don’t try to explain it, I just do.

Running, though, has a special reserved batch of hate I’m willing to throw at it whenever the subject is brought up.

I’m not a runner. And now that I’m carrying a spare tire that weighs more than my 7 year old, it looks even less appealing. The fatter I get, the less I want to run.

Yet it’s probably the only way I’m going to lose the weight.

There’s a weird thing about me that causes me to do things that are difficult. Unusually difficult. And I do them better and with more effort than things that come naturally.

For instance: It’s 11PM, it’s time for bed. I’m exhausted. I gotta get up early. So what do I do? I start cleaning the bedroom. Why? Because it’s hard and it’s the last thing I want to be doing right then.

Or the time back in Hawaii that there was a blood drive at the shipyard. I dutifully gave blood. Then I went home. Lara (my font of common sense) wasn’t there, so what did I do? Did I tell myself “dude, you’re down a pint, play some WoW?” Nope. Not me. I mowed the backyard. In the Hawaii heat. I didn’t pass out, but man, I wanted to.

The best example I have, though, actually involves running. Back in my Navy days, on our 2004 deployment to the Gulf, I had been working out with my good, dear friend Angie. For about two months, we hit the elliptical machine for an hour almost every day. During that time, I got down to 191 lbs., the lowest weight I’ve been at since high school (I’m about 240 now). We pulled into a port, and there was a ship-sponsored 5K run. The port was Jebel Ali, right outside Dubai, in the United Arab Emirates. Also known as THE FRACKING DESERT. I don’t know what posessed us to do this, but Angie and I did in fact run the 5K in the desert. Sucessfully, if not speedily (though 26-27 minutes is still not bad). That was a helluva challenge. Why we stopped working out after that, I haven’t a clue.

So I think there has to be a certain amount of challenge involved for it to be worth getting off my fat ass for. I think this gut has reached the point where it will provide sufficient challenge all by itself.

Now I need some running shoes.

Posted in Friends, Health, Things I don't want to do, Working Out | 1 Comment »